He stood there, nervous and unsure of what would happen next. My friend, Chris, had just given a speech about how he contends with the loss of his wife, and the applause was something he hadn’t experienced before. These people didn’t even really know him, yet they were smiling and clapping over words that came out of his mouth. They were cheering him on in an effort to encourage him to do this again and again, whether they knew it or not. His words weren’t a new revelation—his speech was very simplistic in its structure and basic Grief101 jargon. But because he spoke from his heart, because he put a face on the emotions and thoughts we all feel and go through at some point, it meant more and went deeper with the crowd. We are rarely given the opportunity to know how we impact others, but he was afforded that privilege that day by sharing his grief in community.
Another fellow widower approached him and shook his hand while the crowd slowly filed by him at the podium. He told Chris that his entire speech could have been his own story of loss. His personal desire to impact others by being more open was birthed through Chris’s willingness to share.
This is the amazing, universal truth about grief: we are ALL feeling the same, undesirable, confusing things at one point or another on our journey. Even though Chris’s story is different than mine in many ways, the basic tenets of loss in the hearts of men and women span the globe. It is no respecter of ethnicity, gender, or religion. We are all HUMAN, and are all just trying to figure out the best way to get through this. Whether we call on GOD or not, whether we invite others into our healing process or not, one thing we all have in common is emotions and feelings, and the need to be HEARD! If we can latch on to this foundational truth, we can surely be more united as a grief community and available for others suffering the same way, and in turn, improve our own progress. What a different world it would be…
What are you doing today to help someone? Do you feel like you just don’t have it in you to serve another on this path? I’m willing to bet you (and I) are capable of so much more than we give ourselves credit for.
Even in the depths of sorrow, there can be healing.
Even in the pit of despair, there can be unification.
When we are scratching and climbing our way out of the pit, having someone beside us give a hand up, a word of concern, can make all the difference. Please be willing to share your heart, your story, in the midst of this ocean of unknowing. Impact Others! We are capable of so much more when we do it together.
This link is a brief read, covering this same subject of how grief needs to be felt in the presence of others.
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